Darwin - Ancient Australia

We're not in Kansas anymore Toto.

In this update, we visit; Kathrine, Darwin, Litchfield Park and Kakadu 

After so much dirt, we arrived at Kathrine and booked a Caravan Park with grass, yes grass. Oh sweet grass, how it felt between my toes, like vibrant little green pixies taking me, momentarily, back to the East Coast.

But alas, it was my little green home in a dry hot dust bowl called Katherine. Now when I say hot, we all know that 30 degrees is hot right? I mean 35 is sweltering and 40 is flaming hot, yeah? Well, what about 48 degrees! Yes, 48 degrees in the car park at Katherine Gorge. I think the appropriate term for that is hotter than hell!!!

Kathrine Gorge

At that temperature, the sweat from your back, arrogantly, while uninvited, makes it's way down your spine and without grace straight into your butt crack. It probably doesn't help that my lard arse is like a sweat factory operating in a sweat demanding global boom!

Staying here, in the heat, wasn't for me. My body just isn't made for this temperature, so we packed up after a couple of days and headed north to Darwin. 

Katherine, the town, once again wasn't what I expected. It was a place that made me feel lucky to have what we have, and live in the place we live in (and the very good people I spend my time with). No doubt something needs to be done here, but I guess the old saying; "out of sight, out of mind" applies here. If Katherine was a suburb of Sydney it would probably be in the evening news every night until something was done about it.

But enough whinging, my next stop is Edith Falls, and it was time to cool my fat arse down a bit. This is a must stop place, and had it not have been so hot, we could have camped here (you see, without power, is without air conditioning, and that's one part of camping I can't do without). It was a fantastic place to have a swim though.

Edith Falls

But onward and upward, we were heading towards civilization and we couldn't wait.

Massive Termite Mound between Katherine and Darwin

But before we got there, we come across this massive termite mound on the side of the road. It practically dwarfed my rig. How old must this thing be? It got me thinking though, if we placed this on the side of the road in other spots, it would make the perfect emergency braking zone. I mean, why bother with a sandy run-off from a deep decent when you could just "grow" a 5 metre termite mound to stop those runaway trucks.

Hello Darwin... I mean... heeeeeeeelllllloooooo Darrrrwin. Coo'ee

Where is Darwin? Is this it? No way!

Ok, some quick research on Wikipedia explained the lack of "people". With a population of around 130,000, which is around 50,000 less than my little central coast town, calling it a city is a little misleading isn't it. From now on my home town of Woy Woy will be known as the waterfront capital of the central coast.

Darwin is well known for Cyclone Tracy and the bombing during wwii. 

Oil Tunnels

Darwin War Memorial

I can't help wonder why the Japanese went to the effort of attacking Darwin though. While taking nothing away from the men and women that lost their lives defending Australia, it was like a drunk dude (Japan), full of liquid courage (Sake), walked up and slapped another dude (us Aussies) in the face while our big brother (the USA) watched the whole thing happen. What did they think was going to happen next? What is the Japanese word for whoops?

So we know the people up north are a bit weird right, I mean it's too hot up here for normal people to live isn't it. Surely this kind of heat has an effect on the brain, doesn't it?

Well, a group of deviate Darwinians decided to copy the acts of their southern brothers and steal the wheels of this truck. They knew they had to put it up on bricks, so that's what they did first. Once there they just couldn't work out how to get the wheels off, so left it there and decided to come back later when the weather wasn't so hot.

I guess it's taking them a little while to work it out too ;-)

But enough of my ramblings, you want to see the Croc's right. 

There are Croc's you see in a zoo, then there are Croc's lazying around on the banks of a river, and then there are these monsters.

This honestly took me by surprise. My eyes were fixated on these monsters, wide open like dinner plates from a fancy restaurant. The cruise, called the Adelaide River Queen, is a must see if you ever head to Darwin. It's worth the trip up just to see this. Totally jaw dropping and absolutely amazing and terrifying at the same time.

Needless to say, we were a little weary about murky river water from now on.



With the wild Croc sightings ticked off my bucket list, we headed down to Litchfield Park. This is like Kakadu's little brother.

It was time to make use of that 4X4 system on our monster truck again. This time a river crossing.

I wonder how deep it is and how far around it goes?

After seeing the jumping Croc's, neither the missus or I were too keen to walk the track and check the depth (I moved the sign from the side so you can see this little warning too).

River Crossing in Litchfield Park

Thankfully, some "locals" pulled up, and drove on through. I figured if a Hilux and Ford Ranger can make it, we should be ok. If not we would be drawing straws who would get out and connect the snatch strap!

So we risked our lives to see a place called the Blyth Homestead within Liitchfield Park. This little shack, barely two metres tall, stood there, well and truly, in the "outback". Yes, people used to live in it. Der, I know right, why? I bet they didn't even have Internet.

Rear view of Blyth Homestead

We also had to see "The Lost City"... or was that the lost rocks? I mean, seriously, someone looked at a bunch of rocks and saw a city? Hell, next time I look at the clouds, I'll be saying wow, a jetski race, see that cloud, that's a 300x and that one behind is an RXP-X and the one way back there is an FZR. Come on, surely someone is laughing their heads off that all these people are going to see this imaginary place.

I figured given we were "seeing things", I should stop and talk to this tour guide. He "said" follow me through here, it's going to be great". We waited for a few hours but he didn't move. Dying of thirst I just couldn't wait any longer so decided to leave. I said goodbye and gave him a wave, yet not even an aussie outback "Hooroo" did I get from him. How rude!










But, jokes aside, it was worth the trip into Litchfield Park. There are the Waterfalls and the swimming at Wangi, and this place called Florence Falls. Stunning.

Well enough of Darwin and surrounds, it was time for Kakadu. Besides, I got my tyres fixed and the car got serviced. It was the first place we reached that I didn't actually break anything. In fact, we managed to get things fixed! This has got to be a sign of good times to come.... doesn't it?









Kakadu is a few hundred kilometres east of Darwin. It's a long lonely drive full of endless scrub plains, roadtrains and people waving to you as they pass. For me it felt like a days driving, but for the missus who had a little snooze and our girl who watched a couple of TV Shows on the laptop, it was "wow, we're here already"... yeah, whatever dreamers.

Kakadu is truly the wilderness. It's hard to believe people survived here.

What you see here is Kakadu on the right side (west) of the river and Arnham Land on the left, eastern side (yes I was taking a photo from Arnham Land!)

You seem to lose all sense of bearing here. Everything looks the same.

What way is north? 

It's easy enough in the morning or evening, but midday, when the sun is mostly directly overhead, it's not so obvious.

I found myself on more than one occasion thinking I was going in one direction, only to find I was going in the complete opposite direction. I almost didn't believe my GPS, for a split second, and at one time, thinking maybe it was wrong and I was right.

You really don't want to get lost in this place either.

This monster was lurking in the reeds waiting for us to make a wrong turn.

But if we didn't get eaten by a croc, we could die of a snake bite. 

But if that didn't get us, we would die of thirst, and the man eating sized birds would pick our remains to the bones and we'd vanish for ever.

Maybe only remembered in paintings on the numerous rocks around here a thousand years from now.

All these paintings have meanings, or lessons. Whether it's telling a story of animals, or the European Invaders, or even a warning for people who do the wrong things.

Like this painting, my interpretation of the above; a man who was not getting enough sex from his wife, and his manly bits swelling, to an obviously painful size, was totally wrong. 

Apparently, this painting was about stealing?? No way! I mean that has got to be the worst case of blue-ball I've ever seen. 

Anyway, I explained MY version to the missus and warned her against abstinence while camping. I said it was the "traditional" law that I avoid this affliction. She wants to seek advice and clarification from Mimi (the aboriginal spirits) before she agrees to my version of this painting.

While I wait for "relief", our Kakadu experience has come to an end. Next stop is Lake Argyle WA. Finally I'll be able to get the 300x on the water again. I hope!